For Jeffrey Scott, in accordance with his wishes

In the crowd, in the story, but not of it.

Somehow we lost all the mystery in the world. Left it behind maybe as we hurtled headlong into the post-industrial post-capitalist post-postmodern iWorld.

Sage advice: learn to accept that sometimes you just won’t be able to remember.

Jacques Nouveau

Marcel Duchamp flipped over a urinal and called it art. I pissed in it because I was drunk and didn’t call it anything.

Deconstructing myself. Create an overarching absurdist surreal existential metanarrative the main characters of which will be a cat and a pair of brown shoes. Life continues.

There is nothing more detrimental to furthering the goals of society than pigeons. Not only do they “plot in secrecy” (Simon, Bookends) but they are miserable fucking bastards too. Going directly our reporter, a pair of old shoes left near a statue of a forgotten hero, we have this story:

Having served my purpose of covering the feet of a young writer/philosopher/poet/drunk/failure for a select period of time as was deemed appropriate (I found myself worn out and not longer fashionable), I was thrown out. In a despondent state I do not know what next happened to me or how I was transferred from a cheap black trash bag so full of holes as to be almost entirely useless but at least it served as an expedient and a means of getting the trash and me from the apartment to the curb to my current (or any possibly intervening) state. Rum soaked months later (for I did notice the surprising passing of seasons) I woke to a bitch of a hangover and minus one lace to find myself at the oxidized foot of this most noble of forgotten and unremarkable heroes. Then there were pigeons. I hate them.

Remarkable. Do you have a position, Cat? Ah, I see that we are out of time. We will convey the smiles and ridicule of the cat at some later date. Thank you for your consideration, and on the way home be sure to fornicate yourself with a decorative (fake decorative not quaint decorative or Orientalist decorative; and metal if possible) tree if you didn’t thoroughly enjoy the presentation.

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